Week 20

It feels so weird to be typing "Week 20" in the header there. I remember from Day 1 to something like week 6 I felt like this diet was going to take forever. But the days just go by anyway. And then one day you're typing in "Week 20". Amazing. That means one day I'm going to be typing "goal weight achieved". ;)

This week was rough. I went over calories 3 out of the 7 days. I already spoke about the first two in my last post, but yesterday's eat-fest was the worst emotionally. Damage-wise I went about 500 calories over my goal. My goal on Transition is 800-1000 calories. So, 1500 calories for the day - not such a big deal in the scheme of things. I'm actually not feeling guilty about the food.

It was that feeling. If you are an emotional eater, you'll know what I mean. That voice in your head that drives you to the fridge searching for something to make you happy. Something you can just shove into your mouth. That little idea that eating all the food is somehow the only solution to the problem. It really feels like a compulsion to me. And no matter how much food I gave it, it never seemed enough.

In the end, the choices I made were ok enough to keep the excess calories to a minimum. (Read: I baked and ate a whole batch of cloud bread. Not filling or satisfying - do not recommend). And I skipped dinner to make up for it somewhat. So, about 6pm I decided to try a tip I've heard around the place - I brushed my teeth. It actually worked pretty well. I'd had that kind of mouth-watering feeling going on and it cured that. Plus, it was a kind of mental signal that eating was done for the day. I then settled down with a cup of spearmint and camomile tea, which made me sleepy. And at 8.30 I went to bed early.

Luckily I woke up to some friendly scales, which didn't punish me for my rocky week. I lost 1.2kgs! Yay!

This morning's C25K run was 28mins. I was still grumpy from all the stress I'm in at the moment and I just did not have the willpower to push through. When it got tough, I just stopped. Over and over. I think I stopped 4 or 5 times after halfway.

I told my best friend about the stopping in the run this morning, and he said the most wonderful thing: "Well, that means you started again 4 or 5 times. Even though it was tough." Made me feel really wonderful. Love that guy!

So, I'll be trying to finish it non-stop on Wednesday. But, I'm not too fussed about it. If I need to repeat this week, so be it. I'm actually feeling like a nice non-challenging week would be good for me at the moment.

Thanks for all the love and support you've all been giving me here in the blogosphere, on MFP and on Facebook. I've really been leaning on you all lately, and I appreciate you propping me up a bit! Love to you all.

Here's hoping this is a better week and I can get everything under control a bit more! Better weeks for all, I say! Take care. :)

WIL: 1.2kgs
WIG: Can't think of anything this week... Hmm.